Pathetic Confessions

new account

Tue, 21 Nov 2006 01:57:46 GMT

so i found my old livjournal account and decided id delete it all and start it over, mostly just because i was bored.
so after spending about an hour trying to delete all my old entries, i decided that this was silly and so i just made a new account.
its called drapedindress.
so yeah, ill probably be updating that lots now cause myspace hardly works anymore with its shitty servers and insanse ammounts of bandwidth.
that's it, cya <3

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Sun, 01 Jan 2006 22:30:06 GMT

Well last night my plan was to sit around and mope. A few weeks ago my plan for New Years was to be spent with Jamie and his family. However, obviously that didn't happen. But then, at like 8:00 or so, I talked to Brian and we decided that a party should be thrown at my house. And so it was. And it was awesome! SO much fun! There was atleast 10 people there, which is pretty good considering we planned it in like 15 minutes lol. I still can't believe how cool my parents were with it all....best new years yet!!!

oh what fun...

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 22:48:29 GMT

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Personality Disorder:	High
Schizoid Personality Disorder:	High
Schizotypal Personality Disorder:	High
Antisocial Personality Disorder:	High
Borderline Personality Disorder:	Very High
Histrionic Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Narcissistic Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Avoidant Personality Disorder:	High
Dependent Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	High
-- Take the Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Info --

hair

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 21:56:07 GMT

Well I finally got my hair cut today. I went to that place in the mall beside Chapters. It was pretty sweet. I'm pretty happy with my hair considering I had pretty much no idea what to get walking in. It's like, scene in the front, and tom boy layered bob in the back. It's weird. But I like it. :)

my day

Tue, 27 Dec 2005 04:10:38 GMT

So other than crazy mall shopping with Lee and Steph, I pretty much watsed my day sitting around on my butt. Aside from talking on the phone to random people, watching What's Eatting Gilbert Grape (twice-crying both times lol), watching Super Troopers, and playing Pokemon Red, I've spent most of my time on myspace. I think I'm addicted. If you're not on it, get on it, and if you are on it, here's my profile: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=8348060
It's hot. So you should go look at it. And add me. :)

Mon, 26 Dec 2005 22:45:09 GMT

So for Christmas this year I got a diamond belly button ring, a hair straightener, What's Eatting Gilbert Grape, and March of the Penguins. So today I went and bought a new gameboy (which sadly turned out to be just as broken as my last one...but it was a whole $6 so I don't really care), Super Troopers, and the Boondock Saints. Amazing movies.
I still have a $50 card for the mall that I forogt I had. I also got a gift card to make a teddy bear from Jamie...I'm still deciding what to do with it. I might give it back, but he didnt give his crap that I gave him back, so I don't know. He didn't say thank-you either. But for that I'm not suprised. *sigh*

you still amaze me

Sat, 24 Dec 2005 21:51:10 GMT

How can you leave me here, just when I need you most, and still manage to make me feel like shit about it. You treated me like crap for those last few days when we were "us", and yet I still miss them more than anything. I feel pathetic telling you that I care, and yet I still can't manage to throw away your pictures. You changed me. And I'm hating every minute of it. How the fuck did you manage this?!

gah

Thu, 15 Dec 2005 03:50:43 GMT

I think I've just realized how incredibly anti-social I'm becoming.
I don't talk to any of youother than on this piece of crap. And I just do this for when I'm bored and that's it. I can't see how anyone who could take livejournal seriously could live with themselves. I know I did once...sort of. It was more like others took it seriously and made my life hell by getting all dramatic over the stupid crying and bitching I put up here.
I just read a post about reading your old posts. I hate my old posts, but I'll leave them there, because it's not like this ones going to be any different haha.

So this is what's going on in my life right now:

I want to get my hair cut. I still haven't decided how yet. Short sounds good. I'm not too sure. Hmm...my mom said she might get me a gift certificate so I can get my hair done at a fancy shmancy place. I've never been to an actual hair stylist before...I'm excited. Sort of.

I talked to the team manager of the West skate team for Oshawa. He seemed really interested, and he talked about kick flips a lot and crap, so I figured once I get those down nicely I'll start talking to Aaron about pictures and footy and what not. He works at the store in the mall. He was really nice. He gave me stickers and a wrist band, but I gave the wrist band to Jamie's sister. I figured I have enough wrist bands and if some girl gave him a wrist band, I wouldn't say anything, but I'd still be jealous if he wore it. So yeah, that's kind of exiciting I guess. I don't know how well it'll work out though, I haven't even stood on my board for like 2 weeks now. It's pathetic. I hate winter.

And Less Than Jakes cooming in February. I think I'm gunna go with the Ajax kids again. I'm excited. I'm pretty pissed I missed them all at the Dungeon last weekend. I dunno, Less Than Jakes kind of a hit or miss band. Some of their stuffs awesome, but some of it is just crap. I'm not a huge fan, I'm moreso going just 'cuz I'm becomming a conert whore (moreso than I was before) and Big D was a crap load of fun. And Taste of Chaos dates were released. April 4th I believe is the Toronto date. Too bad I despise the International Center...gah, what a wretched place! Who the hell wants to go all the way to butt fuck nowhere in Mississauga for a huge freaking show, where there's no trains, and the only transit is a freaking bus that stops at like 10:30?! And it's next to impossible to find when driving on the highway?! Goddamnit. I'll probably still go. Just 'cuz last year was probably one of the craziest times of my life. Yeah...

And I hate Coheed and Cambria. I don't know what happened. I loved them, then all of a sudden, I couldn't stand them.

Oh yeah, and Jamie's family got me a snowboard. They were selling his sisters' old ones 'cuz they got them new ones, but when they found out that I wanted to go out, they went and got one of the old boards back. So that's pretty sick. I'm actually really excited.

That's it.

when you get bored....

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 05:07:49 GMT

A Complete Relationship Survey
Created by amnesiac- and taken 974 times on Bzoink
First of all...
Your name:	Kris
Age:	18
Gender:	girl
Sexual preference:	boys
The exes...
How many exes do you have?	a lot :S
Name them:	a few more importnat ones: mike, andrew, derrick, jordan, jeremy, rob (sorry if i forgot someone!!!)
Who did you go out with for the longest amount of time?	derrick, over 3 months
Shortest?	anthony, less than 24 hours
Do you still talk to any of your exes?	yup
Still feel anything for any of them?	not like i did before, but im still friends with some of them
Which was your most significant relationship?	jordan affected me the most
Crushes...
Who was your first crush?	jake in grade 7 blush lol
What made you like them?	i dunno......it was grade 7 haha
Did you ever ask them out?	nope
Did they know you liked them?	i dunno
Did they like you back?	doubts
Did you ever go out of your way to impress them?	nope
How did they react?	they didn't.....
Do you still have contact with this person today?	nope
Relationship gone bad...
Who is your worst ex?	jordan
What went so wrong with the relationship?	everything
Would you ever consider going back to that person?	never
Why or why not?	i have my reasons
Were you in love with them?	yes
If so, was it unrequited or did they love you back?	im not sure anymore
When did you break up?	grade 10
How long were you together for?	3 months or so
Do you still miss this person?	no
Still think about them?	not in a good way
Dream about them?	no
Long for them?	no
Do you two still speak?	no
If you could change one thing about the relationship, what would it be?	i'm not sure
Would you like to try again?	no
Why or why not?	i don't like him
Do you forgive them?	forgiveness isn't an aspect of any of this
Current love life...
Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?	yes
Where did you meet?	the mall
How long have you been together?	2 weeks
What is their name?	jamie
What is your age?	18
Who asked who out?	neither lol it was weird....
Who liked who first?	i think it was the same for both of us....
Did you two date before you became a couple?	no
Describe your first date:	we still haven't gone on a "date"
What attracted you to this person?	everything
What would you say is their best quality?	eyes
Worst quality?	nothing
How do you feel about your relationship with them?	it's amazing
What was your first kiss like?	awkward
What is the strongest part of your relationship?	the crazy cuteness we both love
Weakest?	his crazy eatting-ness
Can you relate to them on an emotional level?	yes
Were you sexually attracted to them the first time you laid eyes on them?	yes
Do you remember the exact date you became official?	no
When was the last time you saw them?	1 hour and 17 minutes ago....haha
Have you told them you loved them?	no
Have they told you?	no
Describe this person in one sentence:	fun
Is this the most meaningful relationship you've been in?	im not sure yet....it easily could be
How often do you two fight?	never seriously
When was the last time you fought?	we haven't yet
What is the biggest fight you've ever had?	umm...when he said he had a crush on someone else
How do you usually make up?	we talk about it
Have you ever cried in front of them?	not yet
What PDAs are you two fond of?	pda?
Do you feel this relationship will last?	yes
Would you rather make love, have sex or fuck this person?	make love
Have you already?	no
How long were you together the first time?	there hasnt been one yet
Thoughts on love...
Do you believe in soulmates?	im not sure
If so, do you believe you've found yours?	im not sure
Should gay couples be allowed to adopt? Why/why not?	no, its too hard on the kids
Should they be allowed to marry?	yes
Have you ever passionately kissed someone of the same sex?	no
Do you want to get married?	maybe
Do you believe that open relationships are okay?	no
Have you ever had a one night stand?	no
What are your feelings on casual sex?	it's bad
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to Bzoink

Yum! Is that revenge I taste?

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 17:54:08 GMT

So the other day I snuck Jamie over. But then my Dad came home early. I snuck him out all ninja styles and it was all well and good until my little brother totally ratted me out. I was fucked and got in so much crap. The war between me and my Dad is STILL hardcore from it, and Jamie's pretty upset too.
So the highschool just called. As it turns out, that lovely little brother of mine just happened to skip today. Well when the school called, they thought I was my Mom and started telling me about it all. This was when I realized I had a choice: I could go along with it all, saving my little brother's slacking worthless butt, or I could tell this lovely woman that I was just his sietr, and that she should leave a message for my parents on the machine. But of course, considering he's already pretty much failing all his courses, I figured I wasn't that mean, because my parents knowing that he's skipping on top of failing, well that would just fuck him over almost as much as he fucked me over.
I wish I was going to be home tonight....

Damn my life.

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 17:35:40 GMT

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

In August mattisbored and I robbed a bank (-50 points). Last Sunday I didn't flush (-1 points). In May I set focussingblur's puppy on fire (-66 points). In October I signed my organ donor card (28 points). Last Wednesday I pulled reelromances's hair (-5 points).

Overall, I've been naughty (-94 points). For Christmas I deserve a spanking!

Sincerely,
draped_in_dress

.....i don't even know. :)

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 03:57:05 GMT

Jamie is seriously the best boyfriend ever. Like I never even thought something like this would ever even be possible for someone like me. I can't wait....for everything. <3

I've never felt this way before about anyone....

sigh

Thu, 01 Dec 2005 00:45:49 GMT

I can't believe how much I think about you.
I can't wait until Saturday. Even if it's just getting a tree with your family. Normally I hate family crap. But for this, I'm actually excited.
I'm so sorry for everything I've put us through already. You have no idea how disgraced I feel when you tell me you're dissapointed in me.
I eat whole wheat toast instead of ice cream for you and go to school for full days now. It's like everything is slowly being put back into place, just because I know you care. And that means so much to me.
I miss you already (even though you're just a five minute walk down the street lol).
<3 jamie.

DAMMIT

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 04:49:14 GMT

Update:
The park doesn't open until 4:00pm on weekdays!!! Eff that shizzle!!! Goddamn my life.

Jamie and Skating Tuesday........YAY!

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 04:03:24 GMT

So me and Jamie are dating now, like officially.....but it was weird. We were talking about flings so I asked if we were just a fling, and he pretty much said no. So I was happy. I am happy. Which is weird for the winter.

AND TUESDAY I'M GOING TO THE INDOOR PARK! I can't wait! It'll be my first time at an indoor park....like ever. I'm so incredibly excited! I haven't skated in SO long. Like over a week. Probably a week and a half! I know my ollie fakies gunna blow....I'll prolly cry. Hahah. I want to work on an ollie fakie to nose kissing a corner of a box. I just thought of that now actually so I guess that's not really "working on it". But whatevs. Hahaha I'm SOOOO excited! I wanna bust out my tech deck and nose slide this stapler....but its all the way in my room, so I'll just sit here and plan all the craziness for Tuesday. Haha I'm suck a geek! I love it!

So yeah, I'm super duper excited and happy and just in a general really good mood.
However, that teeny weeny itch, that little whisper in the back of my mind, it just won't leave. I have a feeling it's going to start screaming in a bit, and I will become no more than an immensely repulsive mess. And I will cry. I wish it would just shut the hell up and leave forever (but forever has always been the most unpleasent of words).

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 00:25:48 GMT

Today I didn't work.
I did about half of my biology lab.
I met up with an old friend. It was nice. I started to cry a bit when I first saw him, but I don't think he noticed. We had a bit of an intense conversation in subway, but I think it was just too intense for the two of us so it didn't full out happen. I'm just glad that he's having as much of a hard time with all this as I am, but at the same time, managing to bottle up everything beautifully. Is that a bad thing?
Then I got home, finished my communications homework, and Jamie called me. Apparently Sunday dinner's off...odd. *shrug*

At times like these silence means everything-and with a hundered thousand lights, timing is everything.
You couldn't have done worse.

It hit me

Sun, 27 Nov 2005 07:27:54 GMT

I'm sitting here. Shaking. Tears rolling down my face in streams, but only from my left eye. That isn't metaphorical. I'm not crying. I can't. I already have a migraine enough to kill you. I just finished ripping my hair out, strand by strand. I curled into a little ball like the little girl I am and hugged my knees. I can't type this anymore.

And now it's over. It hit me. Then it left. I have a feeling that this was a mere pinprick compared to what I'm in for. I can't believe it took about half a year to just begin to hit me. I still talk to people like we're still in love. I hope it never hits me. I'm much too afraid to face it now. Alone.

On a much better note...
I went to Jamie's tonight. It was fun times. We watched House Of Wax, which was scary at first, but then became a huge waste of time. Then we watched The Importance of Being Ernest. I love that movie so much! He drew me a picture. It's really weird hahah. It's in my wallet now. And he gave me his business card. lol
His parents don't seem as scary as I thought. I hope they like me! :S

Boring Shizzle

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 21:04:28 GMT

Skate Shizzle
It's winter and it makes me want to cry. But I'm going to the indoor skatepark with Danielle Tuesday so that'll be really fun. I'm so excited! We're skipping school and she's picking me up at like 10. We're going to stay there until we get bored or until public school lets out and the place fills up with kids, which it will like MAD! I went to the Oshawa park once and at like 3:00 on the dot it was like BAM! KIDS EVERYWHERE! Like you couldn't even walk! It was nuts! So that's why we've decided to skip school and go in the morning instead. So the only people that will be there will be people our age who didn't go to college and have no jobs. lmao We'll be chillin with all the cool kids of the Shwa. But yeah, I'm excited. I'm lending her my brother's board 'cuz I'm teaching her now. I love teaching people to skate :D
Right now I'm trying to get my brother to come in the garage with me but he won't. So I'm writting in livejournal instead.

Boy Shizzle
So I'm going to Jamie's tonight. That will be fun. We're watching movies and what not. Tomorrow he wants me to meet his parents for Sunday Dinner. Oh man. :S I'm actually REALLY nervous. It's kind of creepy how much his parents are like mine...he's gotta stay for Sunday dinner at my house next week. He doesn't know this yet....I'll tell him tonight. He said their first impressions going to last for like ever and that they're crazy judgemental. :S And I'm REALLY not good with parents. Eeeek. Like I seriously haven't been this nervous in a LONG time.
Yesterday I saw Tyler. I was just standing in the halls with Danielle well she called for a ride and I saw him walking down the hall towards us. He was starring at me so I stared right back. Then he came right up to me, like 2 inches away, like I coulda sworn he was going to kiss me or something and he was just like, "hello" and then walked away. It was REALLY fucked. Like me and Danielle just looked at each other and were like "What.The.Fuck." lol It was messed.

School Shizzle
I just picked my schedule for next semester. It's alright, I never have a class before 10 so that'll be nice. But I have to stay until 6 on some days, which will eff me up as far as work goes. Dammit. So much for working only 5 days a week and having 2 free nights to do homework and crap. Fuck. I still haven't told Brad because I already forget what 2 days those are. Haha. I also got my new book list. It'll be just under $400. Fuck times 4.

Well that's all I can think of for now....I'll probably add more to this later if I can't get this child outside soon. What a freaking lazy ass my brother is! Goddamnit. I wonder what my Mom would say if I skated in my Dad's work room.....meh I don't want to risk it. Haha.

Update:
Well instead of skating, I decided I would clean my belly button. This involves filling a shot glass with steaming hot water from a kettle, adding half a teaspoon of salt water, letting it cool, then lying on teh ground with the shot glass over it. But in all my wisdom I decided that I was much too cool to wait for the water to cool. I sat there for 10 minutes without realizing that I was slowly scorching my poor belly button with boiling hot salt water. Now I have a great big red circle around my belly button and its slowly starting to bubble. The weird part is, it doesnt hurt. I bet it will in a bit though... :S Oh man, this REALLY can't be good for the piercing. I put some Aloe on the red circle (not in the piercing though) to try and hide the redness. Wow I feel like a moron. I just hope it turn out alright.... :S

So there's this boy.....

Thu, 24 Nov 2005 14:23:15 GMT

Well I've basically given up on Jesse. I'm tired of waiting around for days on end without hearing from him, then being with him and having my hopes soar. It's disgusting how good he is at toying with me. I think it got to a point though where I was letting myself be toyed with. There's a fine line between waiting and not giving and just flat out being used and delusional. I think I was about to cross that line. So I'm just going to let it go. But the more I think about it, the more I think I already have. There's just noting there anymore. I don't get butterflies when my phone says I've missed another one of his calls. When he signed on to msn the other day, I didn't even talk to him. I avoided Josh's room for about a week, but now it's gotten to the point where I don't even care anymore. Whatevs, his loss.
So at risk of sounding like a skank bag, I think I've met someone else. I don't know for sure though, I'm definately not rushing into things at all. But when I first met him, I thought he was really cute. He told my friend he likes me (but I'm not supposed to know hahah). I dunno...he's sxe too so that's pretty good. We listen to the same music, have the same beliefs, he lives REALLY close (like right across the street pretty much), he used to skate (we can fix this "used to" business lol jk), and we just have a lot in common in general. BUT he recently had a thing with a guy that's a friend of mine (he's bi) and apparently there's a lot of drama cooming from all this, and I seriously don't want to get involved. I think I kind of am already though :S. He's a year younger, but he drives and has a car, so in my books that cancels out the age thing. I really have no issues with age anyway, I dunno, it just doesn't bug me. For now I'm just going to let things chill and do some thinking and what not. I think a part of me is still loving the single college life too lol.
(p.s. I know that odds are he's going to read this. He doesn't have livejournal or anything, but he still reads it *shrug* lol. That seems to be the thing to do lately...)

MY ONLY PIERCING

Wed, 23 Nov 2005 03:29:54 GMT

In grade 12, I went through my hxc emo stage and took out all my piercings. Then I got spacers. Then I took those out. So for teh longest time I had zero piercings.
Then tonight I got my belly button pierced!!!! Woot Woot! I love it!
BUT Wild Ink didn't give me a care sheet. And so now I have no idea how to take care of it. So would ANYONE who has their belly button pierced (I don't care if you think I hate you or if you hate me or whatever), would you PLEASE tell me how you take care of it? Thank you so much!

Skatboard Shizzle....

Tue, 22 Nov 2005 22:22:00 GMT

So today I did like 8763187 ollies infront of a crap load of people I didn't even know! It was nuts! And I landed them all! They were beautiful. (If anyone whose reading this has ever skated with me, then you'll know my crazy fear of skating infront of other people). I'm so proud! :D
AND I showed Danielle and this girl my gorgeous Ollie Fakie (or Nollie Switch depending on who you are :P.......I still think Nollie Switch sounds better.) It was gorgeous...perfect landing and everything. I seriously think I'm starting to get over my crazy fears....not quite yet though. (I was skating in the halls and this cute boy started watching me and I ran right into the wall and fell off *blushes* lol)
I'd kill to pupshuvit again though.......

I wonder if you'll even read this.

Tue, 22 Nov 2005 02:51:56 GMT

So my schools having a Snowball. I know it sounds gay, but I kind of really want someone to ask me to it. I've never been to a formal thing like this before. I didn't go to Grade 8 grad, I didn't go to Prom, so I kind of want to go to this. It sounds cute. I hope he asks me. *blush*

(if you're sitting there thinking, "why this sounds like some hint dropping..." then you're right.)

....

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 20:17:58 GMT

I love how blank everythings become.

I live for that thrill of completing that trick for the first time after weeks of attempts.

I don't do drugs anymore.

I'm falling for a boys and waiting for ~~them~~ him with nothing to show for any of it. But I still wait.

I hate looking in the mirror. I avoid it whenever I can.

I hate my job.

I hate school.

I purposely fall asleep during my weekend plans so I have an excuse to avoid them.

And it's just getting colder.......

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 00:25:26 GMT

Today was boring.
I woke up at 8:30. Got bored and went back ot bed. I woke up again at 12:30, had a shower, and called some of the few people I know that still skate. That failed until Mike T. told me Jordie and some people were down at teh municipality. So me and Jason went down there but Jordie wasn't there, which was sad, cuz I was excited to skate with him again (last time was either grade 10 or 11...can't really remember which). So I met some other guys, which seemed cool at first, but then got really boring. I knew one of them from highschool, but he was weird. So then me and Jason left and skated the side of Loblaws for a wee of a bit, but then he got bored so we left. So then I came home and did dick squat. This is me being bored. It sucks.

Lame Weekend

Sun, 20 Nov 2005 21:22:22 GMT

Well this weekend blew. Period. I broke my wrist at a show. I was suppose to go to 2 parties but slept and missed my rides. I went skating today but couldnt find my friends. I tried skating with these other guys that were there, but they were boring so I left. So now I'm back at home with nothing to do. again. dammit.